Pain of Salvation — In the Passing Light of Day

Альбом был задуман в 2014 году, когда Даниэль Гильденлёв был тяжело болен. Он был госпитализирован в Уппсале, Швеция, и был вынужден отказаться от тура с супергуппой Transatlantic в честь выхода альбома Kaleidoscope. Во время лечения Даниель написал песни, которые стали основной предпосылкой альбома, включая 15-минутный заглавный трек.

Меня привезли в отделение скорой помощи с некорозом. Врачи боролись, но никакие антибиотики не помогали, а морфий не снимал боль. То, что начиналось как обычная инфекция, внезапно превратилось в реальную угрозу моей жизни.

• Daniel Gildenlöw — вокал, гитара
• Gustaf Hielm — бас, вокал
• Leo Margarit — барабаны, вокал
• Ragnar Zolberg — гитара, вокал
• Daniel "D2" Karlsson — клавишные

Приглашённые музыканты

• Peter Kvint — бас, меллотрон и бэк-вокал на треке Silent Gold
• Camilla Arvidsson и David Ra-Champari — скрипка
• Anette Kumlin — гобой, английский рожок
• Hálfdán Árnason — контрабас

1. On a Tuesday
2. Tongue of God
3. Meaningless
4. Silent Gold
5. Full Throttle Tribe
6. Reasons
7. Angels of Broken Things
8. The Taming of a Beast
9. If This is the End
10. The Passing Light of Day

1. On a Tuesday

I was born in this building
It was the first Tuesday
I had ever seen
And if I live to see tomorrow
It will be my Tuesday number
2,119

How life has its way
Of turning your best suit
The wrong way
As if to smile and say
"I feast on irony, my friend.
I'm come-what-may
And it might just be, my friend
That this is your unlucky day
Will you change? What would you give to stay?"

Will I change?
I honestly can't say
I have no promises to trade
For the Lord of come-what-may
To provide me with another day
Every promise that I make
Is a promise I might break

The things we humans say to survive
The promises we make
The lies we tell
Vows we take
The battles we all win to survive
Prices we will pay
Though we all know
We will lose one day

Life is a ride, they say
But there are tickets I will never pay
I'm afraid there'll be no vow today
For any God of come-what-may

You let me live
You let me die
For what I am right here and now
For nothing more than all I am today
I close my eyes...
I do not pray

Promises—they tempt me too
Will I change?
I won't be that fool
Maybe for a day, a week
Maybe two
I'm a dreamer physicist
A man-child escapist
The face of death won't make me an evangelist
I close my hands
But not in prayer
Not in prayer
Into fists

I lost the will

The things we humans say to survive
The promises we make
The lies we tell
The vows we take
The battles we all win to survive
The prices we will pay
Though we will lose either way

I lost the will
I lost the way
I haven't lost the faith
It's just lost in me

I lost the will...

The things
That we must say
To pretend
This passing light of day
Is not the end
Is not the end

The things
That we all say
To be saved
The things that we will trade
Just give away
For one more day
We'll smile and tell
Sweet lies
To chase away
The shadows that play
Cast by the passing light of day

2. Tongue Of God

I cry in the shower
and smile in the bed
I cry in the shower
and smile in the bed

"Don't be afraid"
I hear people say
As if it will let me live
if I'm just brave
Then the clouds of death
Would simply draw away

I cry in the shower
and smile in the bed

The things that the living tell
the not dead
If you only heard them
as they sound in my head
If you only heard them
from this bed

What's on your mind, God?
Spit it out!

Tongue of God
Lip my grin
Run your tip over my back skin
I'm not your kissing kin
Tongue of God
Lash right in
Lick me clean on the inside
We were never kissing kin

God loves a jester
God loves a joke
God loves a jester
God loves a joke
I may be stubborn and headstrong but you know I mean well
Too demanding to call up
But too good for Hell
So if you don't love me I might still be OK
Still have enough time to serve a punch line

What's on your tongue, God?
Spit it out!
What's that in your mouth?

Spit!
It!
Out!

Tongue of God
Lip my grin
Run your tip over my back skin
I'm not your kissing kin
Tongue of God
Lash right in
Lick me clean on the inside
We were never kissing

Tongue of God
Lip my grin
Run your tip over my back skin
I'm not your kissing kin
Tongue of God
Lash right in
Lick me clean on the inside
We were never kissing kin

I cry in the shower
and smile in the bed
I cry in the shower
and smile in the bed
I die in the shower
I live in the bed
I cry in the shower
I scream in my head

3. Meaningless

I still smell of sweat
Still the scent of my giving in
Try to feel regret
But I want it to stay on my skin

I still fantasize
Close my eyes to be wrong again

Still those fuck-me eyes

As I'm licking the palm of my hand

How the hell
Am I supposed to keep my self
When you are so damn far away
And everything feels meaningless
And I am not mine
How the hell
Am I supposed to keep my self
When you are so damn far away
And everything feels meaningless
And I am not mine

I still smell of sex
Still her taste on my fingertips
Try to feel remorse
But it's hard with her wet on my lips

How the hell
Am I supposed to keep my self
When you are so damn far away
And everything feels meaningless
And I am not mine
How the hell
Am I supposed to keep my self
When you are so damn far away
And everything feels meaningless
And I am not mine

I need something of my own
I need something cutting to the bone

I need something that is mine
If that must be guilt, then fine

How the hell

I wanted something nice, but fine
This guilt is a hole but it's mine
I wanted something nice
This guilt is a hole but it's mine!

4. Silent Gold

Push me over
Make me shiver
You're my cover
Let your river flow
Flow
Flow going high and low
Leave me open
Leave me fretless
Peel my cold skin
Make me reckless
Run
Run
Run for the morning sun

Baby, wrap me in your silent gold
Let the saddest story be untold
Baby, anywhere you go
Anything you do
Is home
Is gold

Take my body
Make it holy
As once you asked me, baby
"How do you roll with God?"

God?

God is what we do now

Baby, wrap me in your silent gold
Let the saddest story be untold
Baby, anywhere you go
Anything you do
Is home

Baby, wrap me in your silent gold
Let the saddest story be untold
Baby, anywhere you go
Anything you do
Is home
Is gold

5. Full Throttle Tribe

I never signed onto this mankind
No color, race or creed
felt truly mine
Never had a country or a flag
I never had a culture, kin or kind
I could never really belong
Too loud
Too wild
Too silent or too shy
Too everything is what defines my mind

I've throttled back
I've dialed myself down
I'm done with that
I'll build myself a sun

Will you follow me?
Will you follow me?

This will be my tribe, my family
This will be my flag and nation
This will be my creed, my legacy
Will you follow me?

With me, I promise you will see
Things that your friends never get to see
I'll be too much
There will be no enough
But we'll set flame to everything we touch
I'll take it too far and drive it too hard
We'll fall
And find ourselves alone
Down on red with no way to get home
A reckless ride
But it'll be worthwhile
You'll remember it with longing and with pride
So, will you follow me?

This will be my tribe, my family
This will be my flag and nation
This will be my creed, my legacy
Will you follow me?

Out there
People wait and cheer
While I'm stuck here
Behind this empty stare
I turn the shower tap
Turn it all the way up
To burn this hole a way
I lost a dream today
Lost thirty years today

This has been my tribe, my family
This has been my flag and nation
This has been my creed, my legacy

Now it's only me

This has been my tribe, my family
This has been my generation
This has been my life, my legacy
Will you follow me?

6. Reasons

These are the reasons
These are the reasons
These are the reasons
The reasons
"Are you true?"
True to me or you?
"Are you free?"
I thought I used to be
"Are you mine?"
You know I'll always be
"Are you happy?"
Well… Are you blind?

"Are we through?"
Because of me or you?
"Are we free?"
There's so many ways to be
"Are you mine?"
You know that I always will be
"Are we happy?"
As if anyone could ever be

These are the reasons
These are the reasons
These are the reasons
The reasons

One
Because you fill me up with disgust

Two
Because you wear me down

Three
Because you don't understand me

Four
Because I hate every
Motherfucking word you say

"Are we true?"
To neither me, nor you
"Are we free?"
There're too many ways to be
"Is this love?"
The greatest one I've seen
"Will it last?"
Well, these are the reasons:
Five
Because I fill you up with disgust

Six
Because I wear you down

Seven
Because I don't understand you

Eight
Because you loathe every motherfucking word I say

These are the reasons
These are the reasons
These are the reasons
The reasons

"Are we true?"
These are the reasons
True to me or you?

Nine
Ten
Ten
Ten
Eleven

7. Angels of Broken Things

Sheets of spotless white
Voices fading out
Thoughts are growing dim
As my longest night begins
A dry taste of morphine
Fluorescent lights all gleam
I'm stuck beneath my mind
This isn't my night

Fallen angels
Spread your wings
Take me from this
World of broken things

Fallen angels
Let your wings take me
From this bed of thoughts
And dreams
Even sleep is
Full of broken things
I'm settling the score
I have been here before
Then I was in that door
Just cursing the

Fallen angels
Spread your wings
Fly me across the
Seas of burning things
Pills and needles
Tears and strings
Fallen angels
Save me
From these things

Give me black
Put nothing in my dreams

8. The Taming Of A Beast

To make anybody sad
It's not that I wanna hurt myself
No
But some things are better broken
Than left on the shelf
It's the hunger and the restlessness
That call
A sweet vertigo of lust enticing me
To take the fall
So lock me up
Just chain me down

And build a wall
Destroy the wolf and break his crown
Just file his claws and pull his teeth
'cause when I'm free
I'm gonna taste you all
I'm gonna falter and fall
I wanna give up my dignity
Give in to iniquity
Sleep with my enemy
Explode like a sun
And become pure gravity
Just pulling you into me
It takes everything to refill me

Sometimes I feel
The beast gets the best of me
The beast gets the best of me

And don't think too much
About the ones who'll burn
Every Icarus has had his chance to turn

To burn
To run
To fail
To fall
To turn

It is not for everyone
To touch the sun
You must let them fly
Just let the wild ones run

Don't waste your precious time
Praising the cold
You will freeze to death you'll
Grow so grey and old

Just stay safely on the ground
Just give me all
I'll give you more
Just let me roam
Unlock the door
Release the beast
Just set me free
Cover your eyes!

9. If This Is The End

Tell me my friend
If this is the end
For what do we make amends?
When all has been weighed
Measured and paid
All aces laid
All prayers prayed

I've hidden your knives I've cut down your ropes
Flushed your pills
To save your life

The flowers are dead
Petals all spread
Over the pills
Beside my bed

"We had a good run
Our days in the sun
So come what may"
Fuck all they say
I want to stay

Stay

"We had a good run
Our days in the sun
So come what may"
The crap they say

Stay

I was born in this building
It was the first Tuesday
I had ever seen
And if I live to see tomorrow
It will be my Tuesday
Number 2,119
All has been weighed
All measured and paid
All aces laid
All prayers prayed
Stay

God
I asked for something of my own
With a locked door
I asked for something that I could control
I asked for something cutting to the bone

Hah – I asked for something
Cutting to my bone
Cutting to my bone

God!
God!

Something of my own

10. The Passing Light Of Day

Though life has worn us down
Through sun and rain
Your eyes are still the same
Deep blue against all grey

"Love, don't be afraid,"
They seem to say,
"I'll be here for you all the way,
My lover, my best friend."

Do you remember us
That first January
You had just turned nineteen
And I was to be twenty
We fed on politics and poetry
Two children fueled by unbroken dreams

You're watching me slowly slip away
Like the passing light of day
Watching the colors turn to grey
Like the passing light of day
The passing light of day

Better burn out, they say
Than fade away
Some candles last an hour
And others one full day

But I, I wanna be like the sun
That steady flame that burns on and on
And still…

We're watching me slowly slip away
Like the passing light of day
We're watching the colors turning grey
In the passing light
A lifetime since we met that January
Two young kids feeding on
Politics and poetry
Running on dreams

Ending theme…
Empires have fallen
Nations have been born
The heroes of our childhood
Dead, forgotten or gone
But we still stand
All those times that I went away
All those times that I couldn't stay
I wish that I could give them back
Wish that I could give them back
All those times when I failed on you
All those times that I turned on you
I wish that I could take them back
Just wish that I could take them back

Cos all those times are still here today
All those times they still hurt today
All those moments return today
All those times of "Another day"
You're watching me slowly slip away
Like the passing light of day
Watching all colors turning grey
Like the passing light of day

I need something new
If I could start anew
Would it be the same?
I need something new
To feel whole again
If I only knew
I will see this through
I need something new
Take me home again
If I only knew

All those people who worried us
All those things that were hurting us
None of that can reach me now
None of that can reach me now
All the darkness we thought about
All those things that we fought about
None of that can touch me now
None of that can touch me now
Cos all that matters is here today
All the thoughts that I think today
Every word that we say today
Every second alive today

We're all burning out, fading away
Like the passing light of day
We're all watching the colors turning grey
In the passing light of day
We may wish we could run
Just walk away
From this passing light of day
But at some point we need to stop and say
It's OK
It's OK

"My love, don't be afraid"
I hear you say
"I'll be here for you all the way"
And I just wish that I could smile and say
"Baby, hey
I'm in too much pain to feel afraid
My lover
My best friend"
Lover
Best friend

I'm watching it slowly slip away
Like the passing light of day
Watching the colors turning grey
In the passing light of day
And although I wish
That I could stay
It somehow strangely feels OK
It is what it is
I'll find my way

Through this
Passing light…